Love Is Like Cars

Love is like cars.  I’m not a big car person but let’s pretend I am.  In fact, let’s pretend we all are.

Your first car is awesome. At least you think so. Why is it so special? It’s the first time you get to drive, your first taste of a new kind of independence. You are so fucking excited to be driving for the first time, you could have Fred Flinstone’s car and actually be running barefoot on the pavement beneath your seat, but it’s your first car and and it’s your experience. You will never be able to re-experience your first and that in itself makes it special. This is a strong love experience. Many of you will mistake this love for your dream car, especially if you have this hoopty for a while.  In the long run, this car usually costs much more than it's worth.  But you're inexperienced, so just try to learn as much as you can.  You may not want to believe this but you will survive.  When it does break down, try not to blame them or yourself for the rest of your life.

Then there’s that Ferrari.  Let’s pretend this is your dream car.  It’s sophisticated, fast, dangerous and expensive. But my oh my, do you feel alive! It eats gas, the insurance is expensive, and you’re likely to get into an accident. And when you do crash, you swear it off and convince yourself of something silly like you always only wanted a reliable car. You declare ridiculous things like even if you had the money you wouldn’t keep it, or you wouldn’t stay in NY, etc. Baby if you had the money, why wouldn’t you exactly? For those of you that believe they have truly succeeded on letting him/her go, you’re either better than me or you’re still driving your hoopty or even better, found a reliable one.

And at last there’s the reliable car. It’s a compact sedan…probably Honda, Toyota, or Hyundai. You know consumer reports rated this well, it does good on gas & insurance, and your friends & family all pat you on the back for a good choice. It gets you from point A to B, it has a decent resale value, it’s a smart choice. Almost everyone else has the same one, and don’t forget now…you made a great choice. And…you secretly hate it. I mean you love them, but do you really like them? You make a great team, but where is the passion? You have sex with them, but it’s not the freaky things you used to want to do. It’s not organic. I’m not hating on compact sedans…because everyone can be and have a Ferrari…but not to just anyone.

If you were the only car you would have for the rest of your life, could you be content?  Until you are grateful for what you got all by yourself, no one will be able to fill that void you couldn't deal with yourself.  (I didn't say they couldn't distract you.)  I mean you could always get the reliable car, pop out babies, and fit nicely into society without ever having to explore yourself again, but is that really what you were going for?  I'm not telling people to stop driving, falling in love, or wanting families but maybe before hopping into the next car...you should take a good look under your own hood.  See what's going on.

Life is too short to settle. Oftentimes it’s risky and you can never be guaranteed. Sometimes it means of getting rid of something that’s generally good and not broken. Sometimes it means losing more than anticipated and having to start from scratch. And if you’re really lucky, sometimes it means the ride of your life. It won't be easy to get there but neither is holding a box of regrets.  Shhh, no one’s looking. What do you really want?